Arkadiy Babchenko About The Sausage Emigrants

The sausage emigrant is a late Soviet or nineties immigrant to the West, who left the place primarily due to poor standards of living, when sauges were unavailable…

Arkadiy Babchenko is a Russian journalist of the liberast persuasion. He worked as a war correspondent for Novaya Gazeta. As a liberast, he is opposed to the current government in Russia, and this translates into periodic outburst of Russophobia. After one such outburst, when he said he does not pity a Russian army ensemble that died in a plane crash, he was forced to emigrate to Prague and later he moved to Ukraine.

Recently, he published another psychotic rant on Facebook, below is my translation. Slight changes to the original were made…

I pity the sausage emigrant. I was asked by a woman [I met] in a village in Italy, who emigrated from Belarus in the nineties, whether I know what a bidet is. And a man in Hungary asked me how much larger is Budapest compared to Moscow.

Haha

Moscow now is YES!

Cash by the truck load. Skyscrapers, glass and marble, highway, four airports, electricity and gold, speed and expanse, millions of people, billions of dollars. A Metro with USB ports. Marble and panneau. Railways with double decker trains. Bidet and jacuzzi. Rolls Royces and Maybachs. Service – whatever at any time of day. From packaging chewing-gum to Lamborghini with lobsters, even at ten in the evening or four in the morning. Public transport cleaner than in New York, river shuttles better than on the Thames, restaurants cooler than at Champs Élysées, Government services? Whatever documents you wish [you shall get] in glittering glass spaceport, the cue lasts no more than 15 minutes. Children playgrounds and sports towns. Olympics and World Cups. Healthcare, super healthcare, the fuck you mean! Even free. And the one that is paid, for the money that you pay in the US for insurance, you will be licked and dried, they will do all the operations, they will transplant you the head of that bloke if you want my lord.

Berlin in comparison to the capital of the Reich is now up to date but modest. Tel Aviv is modest and dirty, and expensive, got to work 20 hours a day. Prague is a village with beer. Helsinki? There is nothing to say about Helsinki.

Empire, Granite, Wealth, and Greatness.

And you don’t have to work yourself to death. Splashes of the oil rent hit everyone. Do I know what bidet is? Haha Five Budapests will now fit into Moscow, my friend. Lengthwise, widthwise, and into the deep. In terms of money, full 100.

The sausages in Moscow became faaaat. The sausage emigrants have looked at this and started crawling back. I have discovered already two post in my timeline which are of a returnee, who is seeking a flat. At first to rent and then we’ll see.

But what about freedom… declined freedom, freedom. But what is freedom? A second class citizen, an emigrant who is force to work all his life for what? But here you need to grab your piece of the sausage. And you are [sorted] for life. Even your kids will get some.

And of course, Greatness again. Status. First class citizen. Our army enters the barracks abandoned by the US army with triumph. The Saudis welcome our tsar like a god. Merkel is smiling, France is bowing. The Nord Stream is getting built. Ukraine is getting seized.

Dictatorship, whatever dictatorship. Dismissed also. So what there is dictatorship! So what there is Donbass. Donbass, so what?

Donbass is Free you fucking liberal.

You are boring me.

You have all gone mad from your hatred towards everything Russian..